Here is an interesting article I got from a Netscape home page today...

What makes a man sexy?

By Randy B. Hecht

What makes a man sexy? Ask any dozen women and you're likely to wind up with two or three dozen answers.

Piercing eyes are always a good choice; a great smile gets a popular vote. Some get chills from a rock-hard body that makes it unnecessary for the guy to tell you he works out daily.

Apart from the physical, most women will tell you that a great sense of humor is a must for any man who wants to be regarded as sexy. Smarts are sexy, too "” intelligence and an ability to communicate make for a winning combination. But what if that good brain is topped by flesh, bone, and ... nothing else?

What if he's bald?
Well, then we might be on to something really sexy.

The editors of popular print magazines continue to display 10-year-old photos of celebrities who had hair then but today do not. The headlines proclaim the men have gone "from dud to stud." And there's no shortage of women who count Bruce Willis, Patrick Stewart or Michael Jordan as hot. Shaving his head didn't exactly diminish Denzel Washington's seething sexiness, did it?

Most of the time a naked scalp reduces a man's sex appeal not in itself, but in the ways in which the guy tries to cover it up. There's nothing sexy about hair plugs. Toupees rarely enhance a man's appearance; the bald-on-top, ponytail-to-the-shoulders look is one very few men can pull off; and comb-overs are disasters just waiting to happen.

In the end, true attraction comes back to a guy's sense of humor, his ability to communicate, his brain, his personality. That's what's going to get and keep our interest "” not the number of active hair follicles on his head.

Thats nice and all, but those guys have a head shape where they can wear a bald head. Their head is smaller and they shave it to the bone so noone can see where the hair leaves off

I think all of us do not depend on just having hair to be attractive to women. We work on having hobbies, fine tune our interaction skills with people and generally take care of ourselves.

I'm balding, and one of the few (besides those on the board) who has decided that wearing my hair as it is, is WAYY better than having a shaved head. I can't do it. I can show you pictures of me with a bald head and it doesnt look good. I need to have hair on my head. I'd be a light brown skinned serial killer looking type due to my protruded brow and big head

I have been wearing this hairstyle for a while. What hairstyle? no hairstyle of course, i have no hair! but at least having hair on the side and wisps on the top. I try to talk to women but not the best luck. Even as nice and responsive as I try to be.

I think the person who wrote that article has never seen a man with a good ht. 'plugs' are attractive, at least to me. If done right.

I know a couple of girls at my job who say they like men who are balding. I try to understand what their mentality is on the subject.

A lady friend of mine thinks we are just 'too much man' and thats why we lose it. I can accept that theory. lol

in the end its how a man feels about himself first. Same as if we buy ourselves nice clothes, nice car, good food, etc. We want to treat ourselves right. Hair too. If i had a job I despised, I'd have to change it, or else it would make me bitter. Same for the hair. If its broke, fix it.

I'll have to admit that outside forces made me more aware of my balding than did I notice. But thats how people are. Critical. It sucks and I deplore people who look at me based on my lack of hair and judge me in a way that makes me appear, tired, worn out, totally stressed out or sick. Thats gotta stop. I couldnt imagine having to deal with many more years of this and I commend all of you who have lived with being bald for many years until one day you decided enough was enough and you were going to use your resources that you worked hard for and correct your baldness.


after all if you dont love yourself, how can you love anyone else?

Cas

Good article. There have actually been extensive studies done on what men and women find attractive about the opposite sex. I'll try and dig up my sources for this to give you more details, but here's the gist of it.

Researchers were unable to gather a general consensus on which characteristics women found attractive in men. Some prefer older, younger, heavier, skinnier, bald, hairy, etc. etc. BUT one personality trait was found to be universally unacceptable to all women across all age ranges, cultures, etc. That trait was cowardice.

I saw a report on a public channel, on women instincts.
It was in referrance to why women cheat on, basically, a 20 year marriage.

What was stated was worse than men. Men were dubbed as providers, as women dubbed as carriers.

It showed after years of marriage,happiness, that women longed for the healthy look of men, even when married. They said it had to do with a bearing instict.
If a man looked more muscular, and youthful, they would instantly be attracted, no matter what their situation was.. married or not, money or not.....

So, this leads me to believe that women desire the muscle bound, full figured, full head of hair look...
And as past has showed me, all I can say is, "Yup, It's True"

quote:

---

Originally posted by HairBeThere:
I saw a report on a public channel, on women instincts.
It was in referrance to why women cheat on, basically, a 20 year marriage.

What was stated was worse than men. Men were dubbed as providers, as women dubbed as carriers.

It showed after years of marriage,happiness, that women longed for the healthy look of men, even when married. They said it had to do with a bearing instict.
If a man looked more muscular, and youthful, they would instantly be attracted, no matter what their situation was.. married or not, money or not.....

So, this leads me to believe that women desire the muscle bound, full figured, full head of hair look...
And as past has showed me, all I can say is, "Yup, It's True"

---

That is certainly true. Have you ever noticed, you never see ugly people on TV. They say there are three women to every man. Someone has my three. I need at least hair since I don't have one of those rock hard bodies.

I agree with Cas that a bald or shaved head looking good largely depends on who has it. The names mentioned in the article are misleading.

If you feel comfortable with your look, your general behaviour will reflect it & you are likely to increase your chances of attracting others or even "dare" more: self-confidence is sooo important in these matters.

So what is your ultimate example of a sexy man? Mine is Rugger, forget Brad Pitt.

If appeal to women were a steeplechase race
the first hurdle a man has to clear would
be the "Social Status" barrier.If he doesn't
clear that than the rest is irrelevant.this
is just a general rule,i know there are
exceptions

All woman go thru stages. They may date a bald man when they are in their "looks don't matter stage", or when they feel humble.. Woman want the best they can get; just like men. Some men shave there head but the woman knows it's a phase and he has a full head of hair underneath. If bald is sexy then why doesn't Brad Pitt shave his hair in a horse-shoe pattern only for all his movies. I was a 3-4 at 24. I did have Elvis hair. You need a mature woman who doesn't run on emotion. I do think bald is ok when you are older; by then nobody cares. Most of these famous people mentioned are just that, rich and famous. It is a known fact that young hot girls will date anyone famous; even bald , dirty, heroin addicts just because they have fame. I wish I had the courage to go bald.

These are some summaries of "technical articles" I found on the subject. Since we aren't allowed to link to them, I copied them below. Sorry if it is too wordy for a forum but I thought there might be interest.

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Losing Hair, Losing Points

A study by Thomas F. Cash reveals that "the psychosocial effects of common male pattern baldness (MPB) have been largely neglected."

An experiment conducted for the study measured social perceptions of both men and women when presented photographic slides of balding and nonbalding men.

Cash concludes that "MPB caused generally less favorable initial impressions, including lower ratings of physical attractiveness, judgments of less desirable personal and interpersonal characteristics, and misperceptions of age. The moderating effects of perceivers' sex and age and stimulus persons' age were examined, mostly without consequence. The baldness stereotype was substantially attenuated when physical attractiveness was statistically controlled."

Thomas F. Cash, Journal of Applied Social Psychology 1990; 20: 154-167

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Does Fortune Favor The Bald?

In the British Journal of Psychology, Dr. Pamela Wells* and co-authors write that "fortune does not favour the bald". They reveal that "bald and balding men are generally rated less favourably on dimensions such as physical attractiveness, self-assertiveness, social attractiveness, personal likeability, and life success." They also found that "Increasing degrees of hair loss were associated with loss of self-esteem, depression, introversion, neuroticism and feeling unattractive. These effects were more marked for young men in the case of self-esteem, introversion and feeling unattractive."

*Pamela A. Wells, Trevor Willmoth and Robin J. H. Russell
Department of Psychology, Goldsmiths' college, Lewisham Way, London SE14 6NW, UK

A study by Dr. Charles Gosselin of Harvard Medical School in Personality and Individual Differences, found that the personality and behavior changes brought on by premature baldness can be not only serious, but permanent.

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Effects Of Self-Perceived
Hair Loss In A Community Sample Of Men

Background: Few studies have quantified the psychosocial effects of hair loss using standardized instruments in men not seeking treatment for hair loss.

Objective: Examine self-perception of hair loss and its effects on men from the community.

Methods: Men 18-50 years of age recruited without regard to hair loss, from households near Dayton, Ohio, completed a questionnaire assessing self-perception of hair loss, satisfaction with hair appearance, hair-loss-specific effects and general health status.

Results: Men with greater hair loss had more bother, concern about getting older, perceived noticeability to others and greater dissatisfaction with their hair appearance than men with less hair loss. These effects decreased with age for men with hair loss, but regardless of age, perceived noticeability of hair loss increased monotonically with degree of hair loss.

Conclusion: men with greater hair loss report more negative effects due to their hair loss across all age groups, but the effects were more pronounced in younger men.

C. J. Girman, T. Rhodes, F.R.W .Lilly, S.S. Guo, R.M Siervogel, D.L. Patrick, W.C. Chumlea
Dermatology 1998;197: 223-229

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Quality Of Life Issues In Male Pattern Hair Loss

J. Passchier (Reasmus University, Rotterdam, The Neatherlands) in a study indicates that "For clinicians who treat patients with a range of diseases, many of them severe or life threatening, it may be hard to take seriously the effect of male pattern hair loss (also known as androgenetic alopecia or AGA) on the quality of life of those affected by it." The report goes on to provide "evidence in support of the contention that, despite being so common, male pattern hair loss can still have a significant negative impact on those who experience it."

Passchier states that "studies over the last 20 years have confirmed the consistent advantage, in most human interactions, of being perceived as attractive (by the standards of a particular culture) and, conversely, the social disadvantage conferred by being considered unattractive [6], especially when this is caused by a dermatological condition. The consequences of such behavior can extend beyond personal isolation, to extremes that include overt discrimination in employment practices."

Although many tend to trivialize a man's balding condition, the study indicates the following: "Given the psychological and symbolic importance of hair and the fact that its removal is used as a punishment in many cultures, it is not surprising that hair loss may have a potentially adverse impact on a person's quality of life (QOL). Unfortunately, this impact is often trivialized or even ignored by those not affected by it. A number of studies have now verified the psychosocial difficulties experienced by men with AGA [7-11]. Overall, these studies show that men with visible hair loss are generally seen by others as being significantly older, less physically or socially attractive, weaker, duller and less potent then their peers. Analogous results, highlighting the relationship between self image and hair loss, come from studies that compare the psychosocial responses of people with AGA to those without: common responses are dissatisfaction with body image, the feeling of being older, a sense of inadequacy and loss of self-confidence [1,7,9]. The results of Girman et al. [1] are particularly valuable because, unlike many of the previous studies, they reflect a sample of men not already seeking medical treatment for hair loss. Their data confirm that men with a greater degree of hair loss are more concerned about getting older, feel they are noticeable to others and are more unhappy about the appearance of their hair than men with less hair loss. Despite this, few of these men had sought treatment for their hair loss in the past. The author suggests that this could be due, among other things, to not wanting to be seen as vain or to skepticism about available treatment options."

It is common that many men simply accept their baldness as a natural event and accept it gracefully. But those in the grips of substantial hair loss also know that their condition has greatly affected their lives and lifestyles. Passchier writes: "However, it is also clear that many men with AGA do experience a reduction in their QOL [Quality Of Life]. Moreover, the evidence also suggests that there are subpopulations who, for a number of reasons, experience a greater degree of adverse psychological response to their hair loss. For example, younger men are significantly more affected by what they consider to be premature hair loss [7]. This is corroborated by the results of Girman et al. [1], who find that, although negative effects due to hair loss are reported across all age groups, they are more apparent in younger men."

The report concludes that "many men are hardly affected by the loss of their hair. For them, the possibility of retaining or regaining their hair is primarily of cosmetic value. Nevertheless, for those who do suffer distress, the existence of realistic treatments constitutes a major and radical step forward. These treatments, and the general change in the perception of AGA into that of a treatable condition to be taken seriously, will dramatically improve the QOL of this population of men."

J. Passchier, Department of Medical Psychology and Psychotherapy,
Reasmus University, Rotterdam, The Neatherlands
Dermatology 1998; 197: 217-218

Look at most the "average" people around you in personal or business that have an attractive spouse or are higher up in their companies organizations. I have and I find that about 75-80% have a nice head of hair. Most of the time when you see an attractive woman with a bald or balding man is because when they were married, he had hair. She is not going to leave him because he has gone bald but I honestly believe that if he were bald prior to them starting a relationship, it never would have happened.
It has also been shown that taller men hold positions of higher power. We can't change how tall we are but if we could, I'd bet most guys who are shorter would add a few inches.
The days of "plugs" are gone, atleast with the Drs who are using the best technology.

This is an interesting thread. There is definitely a functional aspect of having a full head of hair. Unconsciously, many women (and other men!) question a man's virility, power, and ability upon first seeing him and his bare scalp. It is this misconception that is deeply rooted somewhere in the human psyche that can cause a person that is thinning to suffer from low self-esteem. If this weren't the case, these forums would most certainly be bare!

However, as important as it is in this day and age to convey an air of youth and vigor, I feel that a person that suffers from anxiety and/or depression as a result of hair loss should always consider other facets of themselves to improve upon in addition to receiving hair replacement surgery. Some examples: taking care of themselves, becoming physically fit, proper nutrition, becoming more extroverted, starting more conversations on a daily basis, and generally having a better all-around sense of self-worth. It is confidence that creates a gravitational pull from the opposite sex, not hair.

-Robert

As forum moderator and a Patient Advocate for the Coalition I'm available to answer any questions.

To view animations and videos and learn about leading hair restoration physicians visit http://www.regrowhair.com/our_physicians.asp

Robert,
Glad you highlight my point! For most of us here, confidence and hair are linked, and this is exactly why we get an HT: to "rogain" that lost confidence! How nice it is to be able to sit anywhere in a public place (restaurant, etc) without worrying about this light just above you that shines on your hair & exagerates your thinning, or to look at your hair in an elevator's mirror with that unforgiving neon bulb and still be happy about it!

This is a very interesting thread. Yes, names like Bruce Willis, Andre Agassi, Sean Connery, Patrick Stewart always come up -- but of course they are the exception rather than the rule. Just like people say "Oh, lots of women are gorgeous in their 50's, just look at Cheryl Ladd, Jacklyn Smith, Diane Keaton, etc. And of course most women don't look like them, either, just as most bald men don't have the fortune to look like Agassi or Willis.

Indeed, women will date anyone famous. I've seen some of the ugliest pro athletes have hot women and eventually hot wives, a combo which never would have happened if they worked at a bank instead. Okay, Wayne Gretzky is a nice looking man. But would he have ended up with a megababe like Janet Jones if he wasn't a famous hockey player? Of course not.

I can say from experience, both my own and that of friends of mine who do have their full head of hair -- women always go for the guys with hair. Sure, bald/balding men do get women, it's actually fairly common. And I think it is more common as people get older when the looks don't matter as much.

Women who say looks don't matter are simply lying. You don't see guys beating each other up to see who gets to go out with the fat chick, just like you don't see women clawing each other to see who gets to go out with the bald guy.

I had a nice 20-something girl come up to me at at a bar a few years back, pre-HT, and start a conversation. Nice girl. But the odd thing is, she said she had seen me across the room, thought I was cute, told her friends she wanted to talk to me, and they responded by saying "To the bald guy?" And the ironic thing is I wasn't bald; I was receding, probably a Norwood 3-4, but by no means bald. But my big forehead stood out. I went out with her a couple times, but nothing materialized, not due to lack of interest on her end, but just because we were different people.

I dated when I was receding and I did get girls, but the difference after a HT compared to before is like night and day. I'm sorry to burst anyone's bubble who thinks bald is sexier, but it's just not, unless you do happen to be one of those rare guys who looks good bald. Then they indeed are sexy.

Also . . . women do love a sense of humor, fit body, brains, all that stuff. But you have to be able to break their perimeter first, and that takes at least some degree of looks. Years ago an average looking woman wasn't able to break my perimeter because I was too stupid and immature to give her a chance. Then as I got older, I realized that once I started talking to her, even an average looking women could suddenly become very beautiful. So I got wise. Some women are that wise, too, and they don't hesitate to go out with a bald man. But the biggest share are not.

I also agree with the post who stated that often when you see a bald man with a hot woman, indeed he did have hair when they got married 15-20 years before. Think about it, a guy who got married at 23 could not be 38 and significantly balding. But of course his wife isn't going to leave him, just as a husband isn't going to leave his wife just because she puts on weight.

Having hair is better than being bald. End of story.

Ted,
Excellent post, right on target. We're on the same boat man!
& if you really want to impress a woman in Chicago, take her to a small French restaurant called "Brasserie Jo". They do the best French bread in the whole US (served warm with your meal), their wines are outstanding and the whole experience is both unforgettable and affordable. Good company too: the last time I was there (July 2000), I saw a Secretary of State & a Senator at the next table.

I once had blonde Elvis hair too. As far as women, it seems most of them will say we like men with hair. If I had the looks of Yul Brenner or someone who looks bald then maybe I could deal with it. I have had hair and now I don't. I like having hair better. Some people look excellent with no hair. Hell, I havbe a hell of a time even if I have hair. I guess it is all up to that indvidual if he likes having a bald head or a head full of locks.

Honestly,

If bald was sexy then why doesn't a model in playgirl, or a movie star, or a James Bond shave their heads to look like a nw6 or nw5. I did notice Hugh Hefner getting the solar panel but he still pulls chicks. Show me an average, balding working man, with a lot of "confidence" getting all the girls.

Quote from SouthCarolina post... (Quality Of Life Issues In Male Pattern Hair Loss/ 3rd paragraph)

"[7-11]. Overall, these studies show that men with visible hair loss are generally seen by others as being significantly older, less physically or socially attractive, weaker, duller and less potent then their peers. Analogous results, highlighting the relationship between self image and hair loss, come from studies that compare the psychosocial responses of people with AGA to those without: common responses are dissatisfaction with body image, the feeling of being older, a sense of inadequacy and loss of self-confidence"



No one would know better than the guy that is bothered by his hairloss.
In turn his anxiety deters him from feeling/showing confidence. This effects social skills immensely. If he doesn't feel confident it shows. Women see this and the guy knows it.

On the other hand you have a few guys with baldheads that show no concern at all. They are confident and open. Women see the confidence and respond more positively to them.

Could it be that confidence to a woman is sexier than hair?

quote:

---

Originally posted by HairQless:
Could it be that confidence to a woman is sexier than hair?

---

It would be nice to think so, and in exceptions it certainly happens, but it is not the norm.

I was as confident as it gets even while losing hair, but it still did little good. Sure, any confident guy will eventually land a woman because it's a numbers game. If he's confident enough to hit on 50 women, chances are he'll end up getting something off one or two. That's where the confidence factor comes in -- simply having the willingness to persevere.

THere are plenty of bald/balding men who simply don't have the energy or the confidence to even try, so their chances of success are nil. And it's not their fault, that's just what hair loss does to you, much the same as being overweight, having bad teeth, etc. affects someone.


The old adage that women smell confidence and react positively to it is just a load of crap. Women SEE first and worry about the inner stuff later.