Hi Craven,

I was just sitting here thinking of ways to kill myself when I read your post.

WOW! I could have written that. I mean everything! The only thing that surpasses the number of baseball caps I have is the number of suicidal thoughts that run through my mind every minute.

I'm 44 and have been losing since I was 25. Nothing I have tried has worked. This curse has ruined my life. I hate going out for dinner or any public place where I can't where a hat. Tomorrow I have to go to a family wedding and I'll be forced to walk in "naked". I'm very, very upset about this. It sucks, because once you lose your hair there is no such thing as getting "dressed up" anymore.

You should see how depressed I look at work since I can't cover my dome with a cap. Oh, I wear one into the office and out of it but not while I'm working.

I can directly relate to the description about your Dad's funeral. Although my Dad is very ill, he s still alive (thank God - I love him so much). However, I panic when thinking a day will come where I, as the oldest, will have to handle all the arrangements and will have to do so without the cover of a cap. A really good friend of mine recently died and I went to his funeral equally upset about his death as I was about attending in my bald state.

I'm still not sure if a HT would work for me so I'm giving science several more years to work some magic. However, as we all probably realize by now, hair growth science is more about Bullsh*t than magic.

Anyway, I wish you the best with your procedure and want you to know that there is at least one person out there who suffers in the exact same way as you.

I whish you all the best!

TenYearsOUt,

I have to admit, my heart is quite saddened to read your post.

Hair loss impacts people in many different ways, and some are impacted more than others by it.

Firstly, have you considered hair transplant surgery as Craven has?

Secondly...I know this is easier said than done...but my brother...

Hair loss sucks, but don't let it control you and ruin your life. You have more power than you think.

Whatever you have been led to believe (whether by your own demise or the from the cruelty of others being non-sympathetic) is a lie. The hair does not make the man...value comes from within.

Hair certainly would be nice...but it isn't everything.

That being said....

If I can be of ANY help to you, feel free to post publicly or PM me. I'd be willing to call you also if you feel it would help you.

Falc

TenYearsOut, we all experince the anxiety of having to go to a wedding or a funeral or other hatless function.

I mean, I have just not gone to some functions rather than consider suicide.

Run your own life no matter what others may say or think.
If you think you will feel uncomfortable in a certain situation, just don't do it!

i am 49 & I am happy I finally got a HT.

I did something about it & it is looking promising.

If this fails will I kill myself?

HELL NO!! I have much more to offer & owe myself alot more than thinking my hair is my only attribiute.

You gotta be a survivor in life no matter what cards you are dealt.

I don't want to preach buut I saw this motivational preacher on tv speaking to a crowd.
He had no limbs! No arms or legs yet hobbled around that stage motivating people.

How can we be worse off then him by just loosing our hair?

Either take control by doing something about it, or by accepting who you are.

Falceros & Folica,

I'm still here ...

Thank you for your concern, empathy, and words of encouragement. All that you have conveyed to me is intellectually true and I reflect on those truths daily. It is my unfortunate condition that a disconnect exists between those truths and my emotional response. They seem never to register in my soul.

Since I was 13, I have struggled with mild depression. Luckily, I was resilient and never lost hope. I was always able to recover from bouts of depression and achieve a pleasurable level of happiness.

Back then my appearance became an integral part of my self image. My hair was a large part of this. I rarely had difficulties attracting the opposite sex. My social options seemed vast.

When the hair loss demon started visiting me, social opportunities seemed to slip away almost as fast as the follicles from my scalp. My appearance started to rot. Women began to retreat. In the midst of all this loss my only gain was the intensity of my depression.

I am now a social isolate. I walk invisibly among women. Hope and happiness are currently a telescopic memory. I'm submerged in other intellectual truths that fully resonate in my emotional mind. Truths dealing with the superficial but nonetheless powerful impact appearance plays in this existence.

Ok, ok, I'm sorry for this gut spilling text. I'm not looking for sympathy but just letting ya'll know where I'm coming from. Although I walk with suicide daily, I have never actually attempted to burry myself. Religious, philosophical, and other personal reasons have kept me above ground.

Yes, there are so many people who have it worst than me. Much, much, worst. However, in my sorry state it only makes me more depressed knowing that as bad as I feel, things can actually be worst. Pretty messed up, huh?!

So is Earth really Hell or what?

Thanks guys,

TYO

TenYearsOut,

Thanks for being honest my friend.

I think it takes a lot of courage to admit our insecurities, our hardships, and even suicidal thoughts.

Here at the Hair Transplant Network, we can certainly help direct you to quality hair transplant physicians that may be able to help restore your hair, if that's something you are interested in.

However, I strongly recommend seeking the help of a trained counselor to work through some of the emotional disconnects that you are experiencing regarding these "intellectual truths".

Sometimes we know things but don't really believe them, because our hearts tell us lies. Some of these lies or false beliefs are deeply rooted and often we don't know where they've truly come from. Or even if we do, we often don't know how to heal from them and learn to live our lives differently.

But I believe there is hope there too.

Falc

I think hair loss has gotta be the cruelest "minor" condition of its kind out there.


I mean, imagine if there was a "male-pattern fatness" issue. Something that would only strike a certain percentage of men, and they have absolutely no control over it. Society would probably paint it as a noble & epic struggle.


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Hi TenYearsOut,

Sorry for the delay. Things have been hectic lately with the kids going back to school.

I have read through several forums overthe years but had never seen anyone that had quite the same feelings that I had. I know that this bothers a lot of other people but it got under my skin and took control of my life. Man, I only wish I could have did something long ago.

I feel for you man. I have never really been depressed over anything else through the years quite like this. I have had highs and lows like anyone else but this hairloss thing was associated with everything I did, everything I wanted to do, it was just always there. Just a constant thought that would not leave. Absolute Hell for 15 years.

Hope your father gets well. Unfortunately my dad past away before he could see that I finally succeeded at a few things. He got to see me go to jail a few times for being an idiot, got to see me quit high school in the 10th grade, got to see me quit job after job after job, got to see me living my life poor and in debt over my head, go to see me losing my hair and trying to hide it. I think he felt that he didn't do a good enough job as a father and that my failures as an adult were a result of his parenting. Shortly after his death I started my own Internet business and it took off very well. Bought a New House that is unbelievable by my family standards. Bought a few new cars and bought my kids basically anything they wanted. Then recently got my hair transplant. I believe my dad would have loved to see this, I think i would have made him feel good knowing this. But a little too late, thats the story of my life.

Today makes 2 weeks since I got my transplant at Shapiros. I'm still very excited to see how this turns out in a year. My hair hasn't fallen out yet and is growing right now. I shaved the rest of my hair down so that it more evenly matches. Looks much better now. If you didn't know any better you wouldn't know I had a thing done except for the scar in the donor area with scabs still.

It feels great to touch my head and feel hair. It is so weird after all these years. Justcant wait till this grows out full and complete to see how it looks. No matter what the final results are, for now I'm just so excirted because we all know how Shapiros work looks like after a year. For now at least my depression is gone and is replaced with excitement and a feeling of joy.

Not sure how your hair currently looks or what your financial situation is but if you can find a way to get the money I would highly suggest doing something soon. You only live once, you cant take money with you, it feels so good just waiting on my hair to grow in. Getting rid of the bad thoughts is like have an elephant knocked off my back.

I regret not going a couple of years ago when I first called Shapiro and talked with Matt. Though I'd hold out for a miracle treatment or Hair Cloning to become available. If you wait yu will be in the same boat I was in. If at all possible, call Shapiro or one of the other doctors recommended here and get your appointment today. The only thing waiting will bring is more grief.

Good luck my friend and I hope everything works out well for you. Stay in touch here if you can. I know life is short and very hectic but it helps relating to other people who are in the same boat as us.

Craven

FWIW, I *completely* empathize with you (10YO, Craven)....I'm barely into my 20s & my greatest fear is that I'll follow an emotional/psychological path similar to yours where the feelings you've mentioned will be omnipresent for year after year after year...

I really feel that for some (i.e. when it afflicts someone with certain emotional and psychological predilictions), "hair loss" can be tantamount to a wretched, powerful illness....curse...disability even.

If it wasn't for the hope of future HTs and concealers I'm positive I would have continued a wallowing descent into total social stagnation. Even as things stand, I'm precariously positioned -- the possibility that my hair loss will take sporadic, aggressive, punishing turns lurks...and that I'll be in a constant state of dissatisfaction, always trying to play catch up, loosing a half-step or so each way.

Alas, we must just inform ourselves as much as possible, take action that gives us the best shot, and pray that another breakthrough occurs sooner than later.

Ten years out,

Check your pm, you are among friends here.

I'll wait as long as I wanna wait for the decision to get HTs. But I won't wait for all these future advancements that have such a long track-record of not coming on time.


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Just tuning in here. back from holidays and wedding. Yes, just got married to a beautiful woman in and out.
Craven, nice to hear your story. I can relate in some ways. I have always been a little introverted and when I started loosing hair, that did not seem to want to help me in life. I did a lot of self help reading and praying and over the years, my confidence has grown to higher than it was when I had much more hair. Also, thanks for the pics, it looks as though my hairloss is heading the same way as your s in amount and pattern. Also I have similarly colored hair and texture. so seeing your results isgood news for me.
Keep us posted in your progress.

A few points to ponder for everyone (I tell me these things to feel better)
-millions of men go through hairloss, just some deal with it differently than others.
-it matters most to you.
-your kids/wife will still love you even without hair (I was loosing hair when I met my wife and she married me knowing it wasnt going to stop)
-tons of guys I have seen over the last few months and years who have been loosing hair, or had shaved heads were with attractive women. so not all women care about it as much as some.
-try to notice how many other men are dealing with the same thing we are, instead of those guys with perfect hairlines.
-we are living in a great time, where advances in medicine and ht techiniqes are getting better and better, which is great because I think I'll be due for one in a few years
-there are much worse things you could be dealing with. Cancer, mental illness, loss of ability to walk, and see (a lot of diabetics go through this and would trade this for hairloss in a second).
-My friend dated a woman who was born with no hair. She wore a wig. She was an attractive woman, and so was my friend. he did not care.
-confidence is key. you don't have to be good looking, tall, lots of hair to be successful. actually the most successful people I know are quite the opposite because they relied on internal confidence and drive and not good looks to get somewhere. The richest guy I know is downright replusive...haha. that didn't stop him.

Anyway, glad to know you did something for yourself and went for the ht. People spend all kinds of money on things that kill them, make them fat, things they throw away when it goes out of style a year later, cars that suck back gas and just cause more financial problems....but hair will never go out of style!