I'm a couple months out of my transplant and, since I've been noticeably thinning for the past 17 years, I'm wondering how will this really change my life. No doubt I'm a different person because of my hairloss, but will I really go back to the confident young man I was at 23 years old?

I've often wondered if having a job and family has also changed my personality greatly. It seems my thoughts are always on that role and I find it hard to be comfortable in many social situations. Then again, it could just be the hair. Or, that I've let my body go somewhat.

What does it mean when someone says "This has completely changed my life!" How has it? Does it feel similar to that feeling you get when you win a great award, get a promotion, or lose 20 lbs.? I'd like for someone to tell us specific things about their lives that has changed.

I'm anxiously awaiting my change, which should start in another three or four months.

Grateful Head,

Great topic, thanks for starting it!

To share my experience, I can honestly say that hair transplant surgery has changed my life but I am going to admit that it hasn't necessarily given me the confidence I once had in my hair when I was 20 years old with a full thick head of hair.

I remember the days when I had my hair shaved around the sides with longer hair on top (I know, but it was the style back then ) and girls would LOVE to play with it. This was around the same time where the movie "the Legend of the Fall" with Brad Pitt became popular and girls would often say I looked like him. What a compliment and ego boost was that right?

But things are different now for me. Firstly, I am married, so it wouldn't be appropriate to let a bunch of pretty girls play with my hair all the time. Secondly, younger women seem to be more facsinated with hair than older, at least, in the terms of playing with it. Thirdly, well, even with hair transplant surgery, I do not have nearly as much hair as I used to!

BUT, when I compare my confidence now to where I was at 26 and 27 years old when my baldness was really impacting me emotionally, I have come leaps and bounds since then.

It will be interesting to read other member's stories as well!

Falc

Grateful Head, In my case, comparing your question to losing 20 pounds could be accurate. I lost 15 pounds a while back and saw abs for the first time. People seeing me were saying " I can't describe how different you look in the face", and another about my slim waist and abs. Having a hairline now is amazing. You may find, like myself, that it takes some adjustment of how your feeling. I don't worry if the wind blows--like before, and how I would dread if someone noticed my hairline receeding, or if I had to get in a pool. Many activities for me were limited, so in a nutshell that's what I've considered to be life changing. One thing that hasn't changed is that life doesn't discriminate if you have hair or not and continues to deal you blows in any way possible.

I love that you are at least considering all of the things that we all consider HAPPY. I go through that all of the time..does hair really matter. At 44 how is that really going to give me the confidence that I think having more hair will bring. However, I can say that if you don't like something or you want to change something..losing weight, adding hair whatever, I think the issue is taking control and doing whatever you can do to make yourself feel better is FANTASTIC. But the biggest issue still remains which is not to stop there. Keep getting better in your brain and your heart. Love good, and read and get smart in things you are interested. I think that rounds out the picture. And, yes, looking in the mirror and feeling good about some changes you make on your head and in your abs is to commended.

It has changed my life as I no longer have this "downer" everytime I look in the mirror.. Hairloss really bothered me and all I ever wanted was to get back to the person i felt I was with hair..

I cannot speak for everyone but no doubt I am MUCH happier now..

It's changed my life in the following ways:

1. Drop in income: Since I now spend hours per day on this and other balding sites, my standard of living is sure to go down....

2. Late getting to work: Of course, being almost 3 months out, I'm required to look in the mirror about 4x as long now in the morning looking for new growth....

3. $9,000 less in my portfolio, as it was transferred to Dr. Cooley, and.....

4. General cockiness is slowly coming back, because I can tell I'm right on the edge of a growing boom the likes of which I haven't witnessed in 25 years!!!

Seriously, good thread and I can't wait to find out the more positive changes that are coming.

Indeed you are on the cusp of a BOOM

Hey y'all. I've been bouncing around the forum, reading different posts, from members who are in all different stages of hair restoration. Be it waiting on a transplant to the members who have had multiple transplants and have had "their hair back" for some time. But, when the topic of "change your life" comes up, I'd be curious to hear more about how much you were affected before your transplant. How much, to what degree mentally, emotionally, physically, socially, and any other area that your hair loss TRULY affected you, and how it changed areas of your life, if it changed any at all? The reason I ask this is, my hair loss has affected me enormously, in about every possible area. How I live, the quality of life I have, and my overall outlook and attitude towards life. I've been told I pretty much talk, sound,and act like an old man. And they're right. I pretty much feel like an old man just waiting around to die. And I'm only 37 yrs old. And when I look in the mirror, what I see just pretty much confirms that. It's sad to think that hair loss could take such a toll on us and our own perception of ourselves, but also how others view and treat men with this problem. Maybe I'm sounding a bit extreme...a bit vain and a bit shallow. That I won't argue. I've taken it hard, as I've lived most of my life doing work that largely depended on my looks. Due to that, a lot of the offers and opportunities are gone, which has made me lose interest and the pure love and enjoyment of what I once did, as opposed to what I do now. And I sure don't do the living that I once did, and that's a damn shame.
And please don't misunderstand me. I'm not saying I have it any worse than anyone around here. I've apparently just taken it a lot worse, and just haven't been able to cope. I've been looking into hair restoration again, weighing my options and seeing how I could financially swing a transplant, and do what I can to not be that old old man anymore.
In a way all of this has become somewhat of an obsession for me. In the last seven years, I've managed to make myself a field study in social situations. As well as study and observe other men with hair loss, talk with them, and find out how much their lives had changed due to their hair loss. And their stories were pretty much the same, but to varying degrees. That's why it's both frustrating and inspiring to read posts on this forum. It's sad that I was once a very outgoing person with the love and ability to entertain and make people happy in what I did. And now I'm a social recluse, that works a job because I don't have to care about what I look like and I can wear a hat ALL the time. I'm at an age where I should be out there living life to it's fullest. And very simply, I'm just existing more than I'm living.
I could go on and on and on. But, I'd be more interested in hearing more from all of you, just because I know all of you can relate to what I'm saying and feeling in one form or another. So, if y'all don't mind sharin some more...then please do. It'll benefit me, as well as other members of this forum...maybe new ones like me. It's good to hear stories where the light at the end of the tunnel ain't a freight train coming at ya. Because for me, it's been a train for a good while. Thanks so much for anything you have to say or share.

Good day gentlemen...for many years I have lived my life 'normally' despite some physical setbacks, I have had many operations and on the outside and the inside I am fine, to me and for those outside, in fact not unless I say it or show all my scars one will never think I had survived 4 gunshot wounds, testicular cancer. My perception is that everything is cool, and I am confident about myself and that I am not a victim at all or inadequate at all.

However not until my hair started to thin that I became anxious and concern, and this started to affect my thoughts and consequently my behaviour, that further impact on my family life.

Nothing else bothers me, but hair loss does...I started to shy away from being seen in public, making up all sorts of excuses of being tired and stressed from work to take my wife out. I found myself styling my hair to conceal the top, and feeling anxious when I look into the mirror, fearful of more thinning. And will not leave the house until I convince myself that it's not that bad. While at work I started to deal with customers differently, I would shy away and wondering why their eyes are focusing above my eyes...are they seeing my thinning and the eventual baldness.

Whether it's fact or just my perception I feel that my good looks affect how people treat me and conversely how they listen to me as a pharmacist...I am not reday for the bald look, some guys look good but I feel that maybe when I reach 60, but for now no.

about a year ago I went to a dentist for a routine checkup and she said she can fix my smile, I said what do you mean, she replied that she can cosmetically fix the spaces between my teeth and recontour the shapes to fix my smile...I was shocked, after all I never thought of it and all my life while at university and to that day I never smiled showing teeth because I was so self aware of my bad teeth. Well she did a great job, and since that day I certainly smile more, not sure it made me more happy or it changed my then present situation, but it helped me express my happy emotions without the anxiety of displaying something ugly, and I guess this is what I hope my HT will offer me. The prospect of having a fuller front and a reinforced hair line make me feel that I can contniue to be myself without the anxiety that I look less attractive. I guess we all want to be viewed as attractive, and if we thought we looked good showing skin then we will not me members on this forum, and a HT will be a far thought in our minds.

So to conclude having hair does matter to many, it's neither a good or bad thing wanting to have hair despite all the other worst things that can happen to you, and if it makes you feel better about yourself, and HT can help and much good come from , that it makes you express yourself more then enjoy it, while we can

Nice post, and I agree. For some reason, people treat this 'disease' as if it's some vanity issue to want hair. Society doesn't yet accept the emotional issues associated with losing ones hair. To me, it's similar to a woman losing a breast to cancer. Who would accuse a woman who's actually lost a breast to be vain?

I'm happy with my life, to be sure; but I wonder what different paths I might have taken if I'd never suffered hair loss.... Hear me out on this one; I accepted a job out of college where one of the requirements was to wear a hardhat. I think I was drawn to this job originally because of insecurity, as I was single and only 24. Later on, after a wife and kids I moved into more typical office type careers but I have to think my life would have taken a different path had my hair not started it's rapid thinning.

It could have been worse, I know. But still, I bet it would've been different. Mine has turned out fine, but I can't say it couldn't be better. I don't think any of us can say that in all honesty. I was a tremendously confident 18, 20 and 22 year old. However, that started to fade with every hairstylist who told me I was too young to thin.

Vanity? I hardly think so. Hopefully one day this affliction will be cured and our kids and their kids won't know what it's like to be bald at 23.

Now, carry on.

Dewayne - I totally agree - exactly how I feel.

Dewayne,

I couldn't have said it better myself. Well written.

Best wishes,

Falc

Hey Dewayne,

I can certainly relate to your situation a lot. And what you and elchinoboss are things that I just kind of need to hear from other members on this board. Just some realizations of hair loss has just gotten the best of me lately, and that's why it helps.

Dewayne, I too had to change career paths, after doing one for so long. I started working as a professional actor and musician when I was ten years old. I continued this all through my teens, into my mid twenties. Up to that point, and more as an adult, I had starred in a few tv shows, a couple of movies. And even though I hated the whole stigma of it, I got approached for a few modeling jobs. I didn't think I was all that good looking in an arrogant or egotistical sense. Granted, I had some confidence, but that's where I simply drew the line. The ego trip just wasn't me and was never my style. And because of what they paid, I did the few modeling jobs I got called for. I toured the country, performed as a regular with a band in Las Vegas. And though I didn't live in a city where there was a great outlet for a lot of acting in films and whatnot, I still did what I could. On the side, I'd do public speaking, working with and helping recovering alcoholics and drug addicts, as well as children with alcoholic and drug addicted parents. In the process of all of that singing and performing, I managed to get afflicted with chemical dependency...which I overcame. And I simply wanted to help anyone I possibly could. I was just a very outgoing and caring person that loved to entertain people, and help them along the way.
At 24, I got married. We had a daughter, but I acquired a stepdaughter as well. And though I continued to pursue music and acting, I had to have that "real job" to pay the bills. And granted, despite all I had done, it's real damn hard to make a good living in the entertainment business. But I was lucky to have an agent and people that believed in me, and backed me and tried to find projects for me. By the time I was 27, I noticed that my hairline was starting to thin and recede a bit. And I paniced. And it ate at me and I just dwelled and dwelled on it. But, I didn't do anything, because I guess I just didn't think it would get any worse. But it did...
At 31, my wife and I divorced, which took a huge toll on me. Not to mention, at this point, my hair loss had gotten worse. And in the kindest way my agent knew how, she told my I really didn't have a "look" anymore that she could really sell to any company making movies. After all, looks ARE everything in that business. And as much as I hated it, I soon found myself wearing a hat everytime I performed. My hair loss was bad enough that people would comment on it, joke about it...not knowing how much it had already affected me so greatly emotionally.
I'm 37 now. I don't work with people anymore. My social anxiety has crippled me to the point that I don't perform music anymore...not even for fun. I play at home, but that's it. I've pretty much become a social recluse. In the six years since my divorce, I haven't had one serious girlfriend. And it hasn't been for lack of trying. I just had to find out the harsh, cold way that a lot of women really prefer men with hair. I work a job where I can wear a hat all the time, and I don't have to deal with people. Granted, it pays the bills, turned out to be a better job than I first expected...but I never though I would see myself working in a place where I wasn't working with or helping people in some way...or entertaining them. I never thought that hair loss would take such a toll on me that it would strip me of so much of my self esteem and confidence, that not only would I not deal with people, but I would go out of my way to avoid them. And as the hair loss has gotten worse, my overall concern for the rest of my health has dwindled as well. I simply don't care of myself like I should physically..because I simply don't care enough at this point. You will never see me in public without a hat, and to the dread of my family, they know I will not participate in any public function where I can't wear a hat. I even wear a cap sometimes when I'm at home. If I go water the grass, I put on a hat. Never thought I'd own this many damn hats. And meanwhile, there are some people out there asking about me, wondering what happened to me, what I'm doing, and why I'm not performing in public anymore.
I don't mean for this to sound like a "poor me" sob story. But, it's just the simple truth of how hair loss has affected me, and a life I'm living which is far different than the one I thought I'd be living...or COULD be living. I'm still at the point of trying to figure out how I could fund a first transplant, while figuring out the second one. I know I'm not going to look like when I did when I was in my early 20's, but that doesn't matter. Would just be nice to have a head of hair that I could have the confidence again to go out into public without wearing a damned hat! So, while the depression and anxiety has just gotten worse as time has gone on, the desperation gets greater. I almost think if I could sell a kidney to take care of this problem...I'd damn near do it. And maybe I do sound somewhat shallow and vain by letting this get the best of me...but like some of you have said...what's wrong with simply wanting to look good, and have a look that you can take pride in? And the irony is, I now live in a city where there's a huge music scene with singers and songwriters' careers taking off from here. And a place where at least a few movies are always being made. LOL. Finally land somewhere to try and showcase what I really know and do best, yet I can't. Because as the looks go, I have nothing left to sell. So, rob a bank, sell a kidney, or pay a good 30 percent in finance charges, IF I could get the financing for a hair transplant? At this point, I'm thinking kidney. HA! HA!

Electraglide:

I think the doctor in Vegas offers a great financing deal, along with 12 months same as cash. He's also a great surgeon from all indications. Check out this link... http://www.need-hair.com/financing/

I feel for you, man. I didn't have any special talents but it still forever changed my life. Maybe one of the Coalition docs will again do the free surgery for a candidate with a compelling case and you can submit yours. I think Dr. Charles did that a few years back.

Hi ElectraGlide71, I feel for ya. It sounds like you are putting yourself through the ringer with your hair loss. Are you currently shaving it off and still having this anxiety? There are other things you can do to increase your self confidence such as getting fit, furthering your education and career, further develop your sense of humor.

Just remember, the only one that can make you feel bad about your hairloss is yourself. While you feel that women are rejecting you because of your hairloss, they most likely are doing this because of your lack of confidence in yourself.

While an HT can give one a boost in confidence, it's not going to solve all of your problems.
With the financial situation you mention,focus on the things that you have total control over. Hope this helps.

Hey Dewayne and Ja-Man

Thanks for your input. You know Dewayne, if I remember right, when I first signed up on this forum, the contest for the free hair transplant was still going on. I submitted a response, but I was actually too late getting it in. Had I only known. I did look at the link to the Vegas doctor you recommended. Any information like this is extremely helpful. I actually did learn that two of the coalition doctors have their practice in a city about an hour away from me. I think what these surgeons do by helping ones with free transplants is a truly wonderful and selfless gift to offer to ones that just aren't in the position to get this procedure done otherwise. I don't know if my situation or story is any more or less deserving of a gift like this, than anyone else around here that is looking into hair transplantation. I've never been one to ask for charity, but I will say that any extra help I could receive in this area would not go unnoticed. Hell, I could see myself washing their cars, trimming their bushes, singing at their parties forever, just as some kind of payback! HA HA!

And Ja-Man...yeah, you're right. I've been real damned hard on myself because of my hair loss. And though all of this hasn't happened overnight, it almost feels like it in a way, as I can see the differences in the quality of life I once lived and live now, and how the daily beating and obsession over this has just worn me down. There's a condition we can let ourselves suffer from...where, if things seem to be so bad for so long, we get accustomed and conditioned to it. But when it's discovered that the light at the end of the tunnel ISN'T a freight train coming at us, we still stand on the tracks, thinking or maybe hoping that it is. It's a learned hopelessness of maybe knowing, but definitely thinking things aren't going to get any better for us.

To answer a few of your questions...no, I don't shave my head. It just doesn't FIT me. And I'd rather have some hair and wear a hat, than have NO hair, where I would still always wear a hat. And you're absolutely right where confidence comes into play. But, I will say that there have been numerous times over the last several years, that I've met a sweet and pretty girl. And after a few dates and things seemed to be going well, then it came that time..."where the hat came off". And after that moment, the interest on her part just sort of vanished, and I'd never hear from her again. Now, keep in mind, by her attitude, this isn't a girl I would want to be with in the first place. If the lack of hair was more important to her than my sense of humor and personality, then to hell with her. But, I've had to say that about a lot of women...as that has been a pretty common scenario. And the desire to go out, or be in public, is almost a dreaded task nowadays,as I almost know the drill. I show up someplace alone, maybe talk with some people, maybe flirt with or strike up a conversation with a girl...but to no end, leaving by myself with no phone numbers or prospects with future contact. Like the learned hopelessness, that happens to you enough times, it's a little hard not to predict how the evening will probably turn out. And though I don't perform music, I do love live music, and love to go watch my friends perform. And maybe the attitude I've somewhat unknowingly taken on, has made me a little unapproachable in one's eyes when I'm out. Granted Ja-Man...I can still be a funny and charming guy, without really having to put on an act. I just like people, and I like talking to them. That's also how I've managed to meet other men with my problem, and be able to have a good talk with them about where they stand and how they feel about themselves. And the good that comes out of that, is that they've met someone that knows exactly how they feel, and I can hear from and talk to one more person in my situation.

And Ja-man, you're absolutely right. A transplant will not change or fix ALL of the problems and feeling in my life. I know it's not a cure-all for the things I've missed out on, and the outlook on life I've managed to acquire. But, I know myself enough to know that...it would be a HUGE jolt in the arm of morale and some hope, knowing that things are moving in the direction to make me feel somewhat better about myself, than just headed down that road where it will still do nothing but get worse. And these improvements...I really owe it to myself. But, I owe it do my daughter as well. I have this beautiful, intellectually gifted, charming 11 year old daughter...that worships her dad, thinks I'm the coolest guy around and is still the number one man in her life. We're best buds and soulmates, and she asks me for help and advice in a lot of areas that you think she would ask her mom. I'm at my best when she's around, and I dare not let her see how this has affected me when she comes to stay with me or when we talk on the phone. Makes me sound like somewhat of a hypocrite, but I do what's best for her FIRST. And rise to the occasion when she needs "cool, calm, collected and bulletproof dad" to get her through a problem or a crisis that 11 year old girls go through. She's the sunshine of my cloudiest of days, and I always want her to have a dad that she can be proud of...look at the neat things her dad does for a living, the talents I can showcase, a dad she can be proud of, but a dad that is ALWAYS going to be there for her. And I'd like to be on top of my game a little more than what I am.

I will share one more thing with you, and then I'll shut up. I don't mean to keep writing NOVELS on this post. But all of you understand, and I appreciate you taking the time to respond, offer your experience, ideas and advice.

This was an experience that really opened up my eyes as to how much my hair loss has affected me, after looking back on it. Several weeks back, I suffered an injury at work. I was struck in the head by a loose piece of overhead equipment that should not have come loose. It blindsided me, hit me on the head, and knocked me unconscious. I don't know how long I was out, but when I came to, a coworker was leaning over me. No one saw how I fell, so they were worried I might've hurt my neck or my back in the fall. Though my head was bleeding, I had somehow reached up and put my cap back on. When the paramedics showed up, they took off my cap and did what they needed to to control the bleeding. And they made me lie very still, as they wanted to put me in a neck brace and strap me to a hard board, as a precaution. And as out of it as I was, as much as I felt myself going into shock, the one thought I remember, while looking up at all of my coworkers was, "Oh crap, all my coworkers are seeing me without my hat on." Even at the emergency room, while I had come to and was waiting on a CT scan and x-rays, I adjusted my cap and put it back on my head, as I didn't want anyone in there to see me like that. I wound up suffering a good concussion from that accident, along with some bad back and neck strain. And I now have another scar on my head, that's not hidden by any hair. I found I had suffered another cut more on the side of my head, where I had hair, that did bleed, but wasn't near as bad. I feel very lucky that I wasn't hurt much worse than what I could've been. In fact, though not one hundred percent, I get to go back to work tomorrow, to do at least some light duty to start. And that's when I looked at all of this, thinking how I was injured, bleeding, possibly hurt worse than what I was, and what I was worried about more than anything was my friends and coworkers seeing my bald head. That's when I told myself, "Man, you have got to get a grip on this thing...and maybe it's time to look into WHATEVER you can do to remove this albatross from your neck." Ja-Man, that's the extent of the anxiety I've taken on and been battling, seeing how this has affected me that much. Granted, I've suffered from depression and anxiety from my late teens, but I learned how to keep a handle on it to live a normal life. But after that...it was a good wake-up call. That's when I came back to this site, and started reading everyone's posts and educating myself again. And after reading around here, ya know what? I decided I would like to be one of the success stories...the before and after guy, that's around to talk to men and women that are in the same position I'm in NOW, and do what I can to help them. I get a high from helping people, be it recovering alcoholics and addicts, to...whoever is just having a problem that maybe I can offer my experience, strength, and hope to. It would be a very cool thing, a few years down the road, to be on this site and just be another voice of encuragement. I would feel nothing but obligated and grateful. I'm just hoping it can turn out like that. Damn sure gonna try.

Thanks again, y'all.

Interesting thoughts shared here.

For me, I would say, no, my procedures haven't in themselves changed my life; I'm glad that I've done them and think that the first one vastly improved my appearance (as will the second, as it grows), but that's about it. Largely because around the same time I started the "hair transplant journey," I was in the middle of some other, higher impact life changes -- a great relationship with the woman who's now my wife, and some renewed family connections that have been fantastic in every way. Not to mention job changes, and, very recently, a move overseas

It sounds slightly corny, but what I've enjoyed about seeing my hair restored is that I see it as a superficial reflection of a more personal healing, and of making things right in my life. That, and it's a small reminder that some things, we can get back, even partially.

Benjamin